One of "Those" Days

Today was just "one of those days." We had a lazy morning, so I made the kids pancakes and scrambled eggs... which then resulted in a post-breakfast bath time. Derek called not long after. He needed me to bring him something at work and get his car tags renewed, so I quickly dressed the kids and ushered them out the door. (Quickly = 1 hour)

Getting three small kids out the door is such a huge production. Through in some 4-year-old screaming tantrums, a two-year-old who ignores every word you say, and a wild puppy who keeps knocking over the baby and the chaos is significantly increased (not to mention the stress). If we go anywhere in the morning, I usually have to prep the night before. Now that all three are walking, it's like herding cats into the SUV.

Twenty minutes after we walked out the front door, everyone was finally buckled in their seats. Pile on extra errands and a caffeine-withdrawal headache (I didn't get my coffee this morning) with the tantrums still going on, I was already a wreck by the time we finished our errands and made it to Chick-fil-A for lunch. I guess I was hoping some "chicky nuggies" and playtime would settle the kids down. Silly me.

It took 15 minutes to peel all of the children out of the play-place and put shoes on. I had the baby under one arm, a death-grip on the runaway toddler's hand, and a cranky 4-year-old dragging behind. By the time we got out my migraine was in full swing, I was an irritable wreck trying to safely get the kids into the hot car. Finally climbing into my driver's seat, I let out a groan of exasperation.

"This too shall pass." An older woman had been waiting patiently for me to finish while I got my kids in the car. She smiled as I laughed nervously. I was a little embarrassed that she'd witnessed the whole thing.

I know at some point I'll forget the tantrums and frustration and miss when my kids are little. Sometimes that though is what gets me through the day. Having three kids less than 3 years apart is extremely hard and feels like an up-hill battle most days.

Preaching to Myself

In my pre-children days, I was a very brave (sometimes stupidly brave) person. Nothing scared me. I lived my life fearlessly. I had never experienced a panic attack or spent much time worrying about anything. I knew that things would work out somehow and I'd survive.

Somewhere along the next 7 years, I lost that. I worry all the time. I like things to be predictable and orderly - so very different from my 18-year-old self who love spontaneity and chaos.  I worry about my husband, my three kids, the house, money... the list goes on and on. There are days when I feel like I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel.

All day, I've struggled with just a sense of panic. There are no logical reasons for my stomach to be tied in knots. It just is. Then as I'm opening the fridge, I glance at my pre-schooler's Sunday school newsletter. This entire month the kids have been learning about trusting God. I scan the paragraphs typed on purple paper. God keeps us safe. God gives us a family and a home to live in. Simple truths for children, yet it gives me comfort. Their monthly verse is Isaiah 12:2.

“Behold, God is my salvation;
I will trust, and will not be afraid;
for the LORD GOD is my strength and my song,
and he has become my salvation.”

I forget how much God has done for me. I can't help but see where He has personally involved Himself in the big and even minute details of my life. I guess I have a subconscious thought that God is too big or too far away to concern Himself with me, but I'm wrong. Time and time again He has intervened when I didn't deserve it. He has blessed me in spite of myself.

"When I am afraid, I will trust in You.

In God, Whose Word I praise - in God I trust and am not afraid.

What can mere mortals do to me?"

(Psalm 56:3-4)

Instead of getting anxious, I need to remind myself of these simple truths that I teach to my own kids. I need to trust Him. He has always (and always will) take care of me. I can't see three inches in front of me, but He can see the big picture. I just need to look at Him and walk forward in confidence. He loves my family more than I possibly can and He will take care of them. I am not in control. I do what I can, but there are some things I just have to hand over to Him. I'm okay with that.

Macadamia Nut White Chocolate Chunk Cookies

I haven't eaten these things in years, but since I'm baking them for a care package for my "adopted" sister in Tennessee, I had to try one... or two. Okay, three. I forgot that a cookie could taste this good.

Macadamia Nut White Chocolate Chunk Cookies
(Courtesy of Texas Recipes)

Ingredients:

1/2 cup butter, softened
1/2 cup shortening or vegetable oil
1 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 12 ounce package (2 cups) white baking pieces
1 3 1/2 ounce jar macadamia nuts, chopped

Directions:

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.

In a large bowl beat butter and shortening with an electric mixer on medium to high speed for 30 seconds. Add brown sugar, granulated sugar, baking soda, and salt.

Beat until combined, scraping sides of bowl occasionally. Beat in eggs and vanilla until combined. Beat in as much of the flour as you can with the mixer. Stir in any remaining flour, the chocolate pieces, and nuts.

Drop dough by rounded teaspoons 2 inches apart onto ungreased cookie sheets.

Bake for 8-10 minutes or just until edges are light brown. Cool on cookie sheets for 2 minutes. 

Slow-Cooker Hawaiian Chicken

4 lg chicken breasts, cut into 1-in cubes
1 red bell pepper, chopped
1 green bell pepper, chopped
1 sm onion, chopped
1 (20 oz) can crushed pineapple (seperate the juice)
3 cloves garlic, crushed
1/4 C olive oil
1/4 C soy sauce
1/2 C pineapple juice

Combine liquid ingredients and pour over the rest of the ingredients in the crock pot. Cook on high for 4 hrs or low for 6+ hrs. Serve over steamed rice.

Thank You

I married a keeper. He's been through some really tough times with me, stuck by my side when it wasn't easy, loved me when I was unlovable, taken care of me in my lowest moments, been such an awesome daddy, and works so hard to take care of his family. I don't thank him nearly enough for all of the sacrifice he's made for me and our kids. Derek, I love how stubborn you are for me. There have been many times when I felt like strangling you, but I'm glad that we make up quickly. I'm glad you're in it for the long-haul with me.

Positive Parenting

You would think after three kids, I would have taken a parenting class by now... but no. Lately, I've felt like our parenting methods haven't been that effective (or it could just be that we have 2-year-old and 4-year-old boys), so I thought it would be nice to get some pointers on raising kids with less yelling and frustration. I signed up for an 8-week class I saw in the church bulletin called "Practicing Positive Parenting."

Naturally, getting three small kids fed, bathed, clothed and in the car to get to said class was stressful... especially since I needed to leave at 6:15 (and all day I was thinking 6:45).  Said stress fueled frustration, and well... you get the picture.

About 30 minutes into the class, I felt like crawling under the table. The lesson was about affirmation and encouraging your child's good behavior with praise. I get so stressed out and let the exhaustion of three small children get to me. I feel like all I do is discipline (especially the boys). Maybe I need to throw in some more encouragement. I need to stop and take the time to give each child a little more individual attention. Maybe that's why Riley (my middle child, age 2) is constantly getting into trouble or causing it.

More thoughts later. I'm tired. Will share more of the homework later (once I do it).

This morning after I bathed the kids, I told Maddie it was time to get dressed for church. She brought me her pink ballerina tutu with an expectant look. I shook my head and laughed.

"No, sweetie. That's not a church dress." I held up a purple gingham dress. She shrieked in protest.

"Look, it's a pretty sparkly princess dress," I coaxed, "and you can wear your pretty new shoes with it." Her face lit up and she raised her arms to be dressed. After her dress was on, Maddie ran immediately towards the door, grabbed her shoes out of "the pile," and sat in front of me again, kicking her legs excitedly. How on earth can a 15-month-old girl be so fashion conscious?